On fire

Blog Post No. 471

nba-jamBeing on fire is a weird metaphor. (Though not any weirder than all the other cliché metaphors). It can mean good, like in NBA Jam when your player literally catches on fire when you play well (or I guess in every day life when a normal person is doing well in consecutive tasks). On the other hand, fire is bad. Things on fire burn and turn to ash. Right now I’m kind of feeling both meanings of the phrase.

On one hand, I’m kicking butt in Snow From a Distant Sky, the next novella in the Synthetic Albatross series. On the other hand, there is still a pandemic but people don’t seem to care, my day job is more stressful than it’s been since I first started over a decade ago (with less income to show for it), and the world is literally heating up. So, it’s a mix of personal and societal worries.

hqdefaultAlso, I’m at an age now where I have to really worry about how I’m going to pay my bills when I’m old. With the specific issues I deal with, I may not be healthy enough to just keep working. Not that I’m particularly special in that respect, but it’s a reality that sits in the back of my head. Can I get a writing career off the ground before I have to quit working a day job? Will I be cognizant enough to even write when I’m an old man?

I didn’t mean for this to be a total downer. There are some bright spots in my life that I try to not take for granted. My family is healthy and happy. I have good friends who jump at the chance to help me. I’m picking away at a short story that I’m excited about. Also, I think I’ve made a little more progress in getting my ebooks out (finally). (With the ebooks, it’s mostly accepting that what I’ve done for Thinking Machine is basically as good as I can get and I should just do the work to code the other books in the series).

sourceAnyway. As you can tell from this post, my mood (which swings wildly on a good day) is all over the place these days. I’m sure a lot of people feel the same way. I keep reminding myself that the best thing I can do is keep at things like writing and editing Snow. The good feelings I get from that sustain me and at the end of the day, I’m making progress in the direction I want to go (even a little bit at a time).

2 thoughts on “On fire

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