Blog Post No. 542
Before I get into a strangely emotional little post, I want to thank everyone at CKExpo for being so awesome for my first event in three years! Only one person had a rude comment about my mask, the staff and guests were nice, and Christian was a trooper! I’m looking forward to dipping my toes further into events, hopefully attending some local ones soon!
I’m writing this post on Sunday because it’s the last day in my current position at the day job. Starting on Monday, I’m stepping into a full-time position at the same building. It means more responsibilities and more hours, but it also means benefits and (eventually) a regular schedule. The past six weeks have been really tough as I (along with my two coworkers) worked our regular jobs in an unusually busy time and filled in for the position I’m moving into.
I’ve always had a poor sense of my own feelings and emotions in general. I’m starting my post off this way in an attempt to explain why, when I experience something, I never know if it’s universal or not. Usually, it is, like the feeling of a shower at the end of a long day or that sensation of being in the groove (for me when I’m writing). One feeling I’m sure most people have, is the dread that can settle in the evening (especially right before bed) when you’re stressed or feeling overwhelmed about something. Hopefully, the more upbeat sense that things aren’t so insurmountable that comes in the morning (usually aided by being too busy to worry so much because you have to get to work on time) is also something most people feel.
Before I sat down to write this week’s post, I wasn’t 100% sure what I was going to write about. I had a few half-thought-out ideas, but nothing that felt strong enough for a post. Then, I went through some old posts to determine exactly when I started the Invasion Novel (because I’m not done talking about that thing, yet and won’t be for some time). Turns out, the first post where I talk about actually starting the novel was in 
I might be off work again soon and I don’t know for how long it will be. Hopefully the time off will help kick start me back on the Invasion Novel edits. I really need to get over the hump on that one. I’m so tired all the time from the state of things at work. And from being an adult in a world seemingly crumbling. That’s the thing about the world, though. If you get out of your own narrow perspective, you’ll see a lot of similar events have happened many times over. We’re not that special.
I remember being in a bad mood the other day. I was driving at the time (I can’t remember where or exactly when, so you can tell it wasn’t that big a deal). I could have been on my way home from the day job (a big but decreasing stressor in my life right now) or I could have just dropped over a hundred bucks on gas. The reason doesn’t really matter much. It was fleeting (like most of my moods are). But, at the time, I remember flipping stations on the radio and stopping on a song that totally changed how I was feeling.
January was tough. All my shifts at the day job were cancelled (as I mentioned 
I have a love-hate relationship with my day job. Pre-pandemic days, I mostly worked at a single rental facility. It was mostly a great job. I liked my co-workers (or at least got along with them well enough). I had large chunks of time when I could get some writing or editing in (when I was good and forced myself to) and I made just enough money to afford working part time and have free time to write. 
It all happened so quickly. The provincial government was rushing through their steps to reopen and my new boss sent me an email asking me if I was able to take a shift at a different facility. I agreed (eager to ingratiate myself, even though I had only covered shifts at that facility). The next day I was offered a shift at my regular centre for the end of the week, then I picked up three more shifts by the end of the day. That’s not to say I’m back at the day job full time (or even to the extent that I was pre-pandemic). Five shifts in two weeks isn’t much and it will be a while before the facility where I work is open for more than rentals (if at all). 
Blog Post No. 450
While 
Ben Van Dongen 